Attention: Utah Drivers. Red Means not to Go.

The cold, unstable body inhales green, coughs yellow, then bleeds red. Two beings intersect an alternative, bringing failure to the traffic light’s responsibility. And though this indicator still insists a moving forward, it is continuously stopped by such cruising stupidity.

If it’s not the texters, lipstick-appliers or turn-around-to-discipline mothers that cause a twenty second delay in taking advantage of the green light, then it’s the put-my-life-in-risk drivers who exploit utahardation.

First time, it’s a bizarre experience that you shock your mates with. The second time, you huff, puff and blow an, “Are you freaking kidding me out the window”. But a third time, your horn avows an utter frustration. Eventually your temper dials down and you take the detour to interstate relief.

But errands have left you with five more miles of traveling. The grumble of your V-8 engine stalls followers into irritability. However, an audience grants access to you and the others. And proudly a triple turn is performed ahead and encourages no encore.

Yes, there is the occasional generosity, but this does not suppress the rudeness expressed on the roads in the boroughs of Utah County.


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